Fun With Flying

How long does it take to get from Guangzhou to Nashville? Let me tell you. About 30 hours. Considering that it used to take months to travel a thousand miles, one should hardly grumble about getting from one side of the world to the other in less than one and a half days. However, while 30 hours doesn’t sound too bad when you buy your plane ticket, getting from Point A to Point B is a lot more work than you realize it is going to be.

My day of travel started with a taxi ride. I was picked up from The Penthouse at 7:00 a.m. I spent 45 minutes in the car with my driver. We spoke little as my Mandarin currently allows me to ask where the bathroom is located or to order a double cheeseburger without mustard at McDonald’s. I did manage to tell him I was flying to Beijing and arrived at the correct terminal. I checked in for my flight to discover that I could only check in for my flight to Beijing. I would have to check in for my flight to DC in Beijing. Not exactly cool.

Not daunted, I caught up with a friend who was on my flight to Beijing. We hit the ladies room (this one had potties you sit on and toilet paper as opposed to the kind you squat over that usually don’t have toilet paper) and headed for security. Once through security, we headed into the expansive domestic terminal of the Baiyun International Airport. It has about 14 gates and 4 shops once you get past security. Oh, and a Starbucks, but those are everywhere in China. I’m sure they will be building one on the Great Wall before too long. We shopped for trinkets and got on our flight. My friend upgraded to first class, so I slunk back to the cheap seats. At least I had a window. And a pillow. Three hours, one nap and a beef with rice entrée later, I emerged from the plane in Beijing.

As I was not checked in for my next flight, I had to collect my bags. I waited, waited some more and then got in a bit more waiting. When there were 6 of us left, my bags finally decided to appear. I was better off than my friend. She checked her bags, but was not giving boarding passes. We sent a frenzy of texts back and forth trying to discover the secrets of checking in at the Beijing airport. I checked with a travel agent and found that I needed to go to the 4^th floor to check in. So I did. And found out that the baggage allowance to the US had changed. However, as I didn’t really believe the nice lady behind the counter, I stood there and tried to look it up on my phone to prove her wrong. After about 5 minutes she gave in and checked my second bag for free. Score. I realize I won’t be as lucky going back, as now that I have looked up the rule I’m not quite so indignant.

I headed upstairs to find my travel buddy and to have a snack. On a scale of one to ten, Thai food at the Beijing airport is probably a five. It fills a hole, but it’s nothing you would get really excited about flying back for. But, it killed a couple of hours before part deux of the flying odyssey. Once clearing customs to get out of China, there were still more hours to kill. I visited almost every shop in the Beijing International Airport. That took about an hour. By this time, my friend was ready to get on her flight, so I hugged her goodbye and went in search of liquid refreshment. Able to find water and Diet Coke, I headed for my gate. I found a lot of my countrymen, something which is not all that common in Guangzhou. I had forgotten how loud American college students are. And for a moment, I missed the language barrier as the conversation was a bit banal. But, the flight was called for boarding and I headed down the ramp. To have my bag searched. And my beverages confiscated. Since when did people start taking drinks away once you have gone through security? Was I going to make a diet coke bomb? Grrrr…whatever.

I found my seat and settled in for my flight. This one was 12 ½ hours or so. I sat next to a lovely woman living in Shanghai. We both took alternating naps for the first 10 hours of the flight, but had a great chat as we approached DC. By the time the plane landed, I had been travelling for close to 24 hours. Mary and I parted ways at flight transfer and I headed to immigration. When the agent asked me where I had been, I told him “Guangzhou.” “Where?” he said. It amazes me that no one has heard of one of the largest cities in the world double the size of New York City (and much cooler, I may add). Once I educated him on Chinese geography, I grabbed my bags, rechecked them and headed out into the terminal. The only redeeming feature of Dulles International Airport is the California Burrito Company. Burrito? Queso and chips? Yes please. I practically drooled on the guy that handed me my food. He didn’t think I was quite so psycho when I explained that I had been in China for five months.

As I headed for my gate and waited for my next flight, I was glad to know that I would soon be home. I boarded and realized that I booked the refrigerated seat, which was next to the galley door. It was a 40 seat commuter, and a little squashy, but only a 90 minute flight. Unless you have to de-ice the plan. And wait in line to get the plane de-iced. Sigh. After about an hour on the ground, we were in the air. The guy behind me grumbled a bit. I decided not to tell him that he had nothing on me as I had been traveling for 30 hours. I kept it to myself. And kissed the ground when the plane finally landed in Nashville. OK, I didn’t kiss the ground, but I did drink out of the water fountain, which is kind of like kissing the ground. It was good to be back in the USA.